Straw Man

I have a carton full of straws that I bought at the Korean Deli on the corner at the ready during singing lessons.

They sit in their box since I teach remotely like the rest of the world—though I can’t say they made much of an appearance while students were in the studio.

I’m not a Straw Man, a Gadget Man, or a Boys With Toys Kinda Guy. You won’t find me twiddling with voice analysis programs. None of that stuff. Mind you—I’m not against these devices.

Everything has its place.

The cabaret/broadway/actor who came for his lesson after a week of intense, lengthy rehearsals sounding raspy?

I put a straw in his mouth!

However, I am acutely aware that straws can’t teach him to breath, form clear vowels, apprehend what he is doing (or not doing), stabilize his technique enough to enable him to speak & sing for 2.5 hours without fatigue, or prevent him from getting in trouble in the first place.

Here’s how I see it.

Straws are the training wheels of the 21st century. Like the vaunted lip trill, they may help a student get the bike moving, or get back on it after they’ve fallen off, but the straw is no substitute for the training necessary to compete in the Vocal Tour de France.

What worries me about straws?

The pill-popping, marketing mentality that seems to accompany them: “Straws are Nirvana! All I have to do is put one in my mouth and I’ll be fine!”

I don’t want to say straws are a fad or pedagogic junk food, but their use does remind me that tongue depressors were once all the rage. Douglas Stanley anyone?

The danger of dependence is an issue too.

You may wear a brace around your neck to keep your cervical vertebrae in place, but if don’t go to rehab and learn how to strengthen your muscles, that brace will cripple you (Alexander’s “back, up and forward” directive is helpful in this regard).

The Italian Classical Song-School view?

If you don’t hear/feel every single one of your vowels “touching” (or starting from) the middle of your head, you don’t know what you’re doing yet—and you need a great deal more than a mechanical prop to achieve this.